So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
Randomize
