I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
Randomize
