am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
