wat bout pragnant strippers??
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize
