; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
Randomize
