Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
