Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Randomize
