Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
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