so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize
