Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
Everclear isn't food dammit
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Randomize
