your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
im about as happy as oj after his trial
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
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