Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
Randomize
