I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
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