Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
Randomize
