good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
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