im gay
i know
yea but for you.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Randomize
