I want to stick my p in your. b.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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