just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
