Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
Randomize
