How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
Randomize
