question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Randomize
