dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Randomize