So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize