are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize