based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
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