remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
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