just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
She came home wasted 'not wantin to talk about it' so for revenge I woke her up with a dutch oven and she puked all over me and the bed. I can't win.
Dude I told you 22 year olds shouldn't get married
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
