she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
3pm strippers are depressing
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
Randomize
