I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
operation harelip BJ is a go
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
