i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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