I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Randomize
