:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
How's work?
Spinning.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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