I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
You were trust falling into bushes
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
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