Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
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