He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
Randomize
