JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
Randomize
