At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
we're chasing vodka with high fives
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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