Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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