Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
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