If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
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