and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
Randomize