he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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