but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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