Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
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