and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
It's shark week go big or go home
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
