Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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