i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
