her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Randomize
