You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
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