you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
Randomize
