He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Randomize